Happy 500th Birthday...

We interrupt our regularly scheduled blogging on Calvin, for some perspective on the man...

From RC Sproul, Jr.'s Q&A:

Q: Is it fitting for we who are Calvinists to adopt the theology of a man, and one who murdered Servetus?

 

A: "...of course it would be wrong to adopt a theology of a man. Those who accuse Calvinists of doing so, however, expose their own historical ignorance. Calvinists are not followers of Calvin. Neither are they followers of a theology created by Calvin. Instead we are they who embrace a system of thought that has a long and honored history in the church. If our theology derived from any lone man, and it didn’t, that man would be Saint Augustine , whom Calvin quoted more than any other scholar. Our tradition includes the Puritans, and the Pilgrims, the Dutch Reformed church, the Scottish Kirk that blossomed under John Knox. It includes the German Reformed church and the French Huguenots. Calvinism existed before Calvin and it thrives now five hundred years after his birth. Ours is the theology of the Reformation.

 

"Which still is reason enough in some people’s minds to reject it. Some point out the all too painful reality that in some instances the power of the sword was used during the time of the Reformation to “settle” theological disputes. Servetus was indeed put to death in Geneva , the town where Calvin served, and put to death not for what we would today consider crimes, but for propagating heresy. More broadly still the Reformed during the time of the Reformation believed it fitting to wage literal war against theological opponents on both ends of the spectrum. They warred with Rome , and together with Rome warred against the Anabaptists. My spiritual fathers took up carnal weapons in their quest to make known the reign of Christ over all things. I believe they were wrong to do so, horribly, horribly wrong.

 

"The willingness to use the power of the state in this kind of context was, in my judgment, both grievous error, and terribly common error. It was, in fact, evidence of an insufficient Reformation. Our spiritual fathers sadly here followed in the footsteps of their immediate fathers, Rome herself. The Anabaptists, though they erred and continue to err in denying the fittingness of Christians to wage just war, rightly understood that war was not the right means to persuade those either outside the kingdom, or even occupying a different corner of the kingdom. In a similar manner, Calvin erred, in my judgment, in not urging the city fathers of Geneva against the execution of Servetus. (Remember, however, that however muddied their conception of appropriate spheres of authority, it was the civil government, over which Calvin had no authority, that condemned Servetus.) Calvin murdered no one. He did have a deficient understanding of the appropriate limits of state power.

 

"We would be wise to remember that all our heroes save one had feet of clay. As we this year celebrate the 500^th birthday of Calvin, let us not fall into a hagiography that he himself would not approve, turning heroes into sinless saints. Let us not, on the other hand, however, succumb to revisionist history that would turn heroes into monsters. Let us give thanks for that Biblical theology that we sometimes call Calvinism, and give thanks for Calvin."

Perspective

From Jay Adams:

"[Jesus] is the firstfuits of those who will be raised from the dead to eternal life. He is the One in Whom all that we were incapable of doing as sinners was accomplished perfectly so that, being “in Him,” we are counted (reckoned) to be just before the Judge of the universe since His righteousness is reckoned to us.
You have much to rejoice about, Christian. Sure things go wrong here-very much so. But in His time, all will be set straight. And, at that time, you will enter into all of the joys, privileges and love that will be realized when you shall see Him as He is. There is much to look forward to. Remember that fact when things get tough here."

Against everything... what for?

From Steve Wilkins:

"The perception surrounding the words “protest” and “protestantism” have affected our own psychology. We have in fact become more “negative” than affirmative. We think of ourselves as the guys whose specialty is spotting errors, identifying misunderstandings, and locating heresies from a mile away so that we can shoot them through the center hole. As a result, our corporate identity has become one of complainers and nit-pickers — those who are always seeing the problems and errors in everything and everyone around us (i.e. everything except our things and everyone except ourselves). We’ve forgotten who we are and consequently have, more often than not, lived up to the caricatures others have drawn. We have become divisive, self-righteous, Pharisaical, and arrogant."

Losing our religion

This is an interesting graph of the changing religious professions of Americans over the last 18 years.

Courtship - details

Chapter 5

When approached by a friend-become-suitor dad should hear him out graciously, take a few days, pray and talk with his wife and daughter. If the answer is yes, he spends time with the family, together. If that goes well, they have time more alone, still accountable, maybe completely by themselves, depending. If things start deteriorating, the father should intervene pronto, and show him the door. If that goes well, the young man should be asking for her hand shortly. If he doesn't, the father should call the question, discerning whether it is a cold feet "yes," or an indecisive "no."

Don't spend so much time and energy on the wedding - the doorway into the new household - that you neglect or trash the new household itself. At a wedding the family reproduces itself, while the church and state witness it, binding the new household to covenant faithfulness.

Marriage brings out the selfishness or servanthood in a person. Honor and serve each other out of honor for God.

Objection to courtship #1: parents can make mistakes

Answer: so do the young people; the Bible puts dad in charge.

Objection #2: how can we require what we didn't do ourselves?

The Bible sets the pattern, not our experience. Do you permit sexual impurity in your children if you weren't pure yourselves?

Objection #3: how can we get to know the young people that will be interested in our children?

Have them in your home in a group setting, that doesn't pair people up. Character is revealed far more clearly in a group setting than in one-on-one dating. Watch how he talks to his mother, more than how he smooth-talks you on a date. The couple should not be growing attached while putting up appearances with each other on dates, before discerning each other's character more objectively in group settings. Relational hyper-sensitivity and angst in young people ("she likes me! oooohhhh, she doesn't like me...) needs to be matured by parents who encourage and admonish - it won't be cured by courtship.

Pairing off informally is bad news. It leaves both parties, especially the girl, unprotected. You need to commit to courting a girl with the intent of marrying her, after discerning her character is good and you are attracted to her, but before you have any intimate knowledge of her outside a group.

Jealousy is bad news... jealousy among the parents!

It is disguised, because it is concern for another: their child - but it is still sin to be jealous for your child against another, where there is no marriage covenant to be rightly jealous over.

Courtship - criteria

Chapter 4

Criteria for courtship. A suitor needs to be

1 a Christian

2 a likeminded Christian (education, baptism, doctrine, etc.)

3 financially stable.

The groom paid the OT bride price to the bride or her family, to demonstrate the financial security he could give his bride - Deut 22:28-29. Biblical cultures give women financial security when entering marriage.

4 attractive to the girl, and the girl to the suitor!

Also, consider if intellectual and cultural backgrounds, as well as vocational pursuits, are compatible. Does she know he wants to be a pilot out in the bush?

Women shouldn't sit still and wait for a man, but be productive. This means a man when he comes along will interrupt her life, and that is fine, if she is really seeking marriage, as she should be.

Sometimes it seems there are only two options: meek and emasculated Christian young men, or confident and assertive immature Christians or non-Christians. Women are tempted to settle for less spiritually to have what looks like strength and leadership.

Courtship - preparing daughters

Chapter 3

Courtship can't happen without the daughter's buy-in. She should trust her father, and he should establish that trust by leading well over her whole life - Colossians 3:21. She still needs to obey him, even if he hasn't led well, but he should make it easy for her to obey and trust him to have her best interest at heart - not his own.

Dad has to train his daughter in modesty, not seeking the attention of men by how she dresses. The young man seeks a sexual relationship with the man's daughter - no point denying this. Dad doesn't protect her from this - it is the whole point! - but from improper sexual attention and attraction at the outset.

But we should affirm feminine beauty, since Scripture does (Gen 12:11, 14; 24:16; 29:17; 1 Sam 25:3; Esther 1:11; 2:7; Job 42:15; Song of Solomon). Make-up is not inherently sinful (Ezek 16:6:14), but can be applied ostentatiously and sinfully. Find the balance between Islamic restrictiveness and worldly wantonness.

Dad should live in a way that daughter respects him, and seeks a suitor she can respect similarly. She will then be glad to be given by a godly man to a godly man.

Daughters should know how to (1) reject firmly sexual advances; how to (2) stay distant from opposite sex friends who happen to be around a lot, mildly flirting; how to (3) point honorable suitors to her father. Parents and daughters both should be careful not to favor the suitor who does everything by the book (going to dad, first, e.g.), but to judge his actual character. Parents should render tentative and initial assessments of young men in the community to their daughters. Don't let siblings' tease your daughter about courtship possibilities, or keep her from discussing them with parents/family.

Courtship - preparing sons

Parents need to equip sons to leave home - Gen 2:24 - by teaching them about marriage, from 1 Cor 6-7; Leviticus 18; Mark 6:18; 1 Cor 7:39, and by living it themselves. Marriage is an earthly, covenantal union, not an eternal, metaphysical union. Encourage and channel boys' masculinity, don't discipline it out of them. Else they'll be too timid to intervene in a girl's life. A boy may hear "no" from her father; he should have been learning long before this from his parents to cope well with getting knocked down. Parents also instill self-control early, so the boy can control himself sexually, needing to wait several years from desire to fulfillment.

Young men should always assume the burden of proof in moving the relationship forward, explaining to her father and her his plans, Lord willing. He doesn't press for a commitment from her ahead of time, using God's will as leverage to get it. He protects her from the risk of initiating, relationally. He lets her respond to him, and if it is no, he protects her from having to explain why. Her dad will be her main protection in this, and the young man protects her by going through him. He is a gentleman.

Courtship - Authority of parents

...over daughters - Chapter 1

Numbers 30 (especially verse 5) teaches that a husband or father can ratify or veto a wife’s or daughter’s vows or commitments, when he hears of it. This applies to a daughter’s commitment to a suitor. Numbers 30 also teaches by implication that there is no period of independence for a young woman between being under her father’s authority and then getting married. Exception: widows and divorcees are independent of their fathers. The Bible speaks of women as “given in marriage” (Ps 78:63; Luke 20:34; Matt 24:38), which means someone (dad) has the authority to give her.

Romance is a blessing from God, but can't be the foundation of a relationship - it is the window dressing. Dad's authority extends over his daughter's romantic, emotional, spiritual and physical attachments to young men. Deuteronomy 22:13-21 and Exodus 22:16-17 teach that dad is responsible for his daughter's sexual purity, and can decide whether or not to give her in marriage, AFTER sexual activity has taken place. "How much more does the father have the authority to say NO when there is nothing more than mild emotional or sexual interest?"

Courting activity is connected to the daughter's family, but in dating the couple's privacy is paramount.

Courtship - Introduction

"Biblical Courtship in the Modern World"

I'm reading this booklet today - going to review/summarize it here, chapter by chapter.

Introduction

Our current dating practice encourages sexual activity, emotional vulnerability without covenant protection, and comfort with serial relationships and break-ups. Just because many “survive” and successfully marry after dating doesn’t make it a good system. God made men to initiate, and women to respond, generally. Dating takes most of the risk out of the initiation, with flirting – the guy can tell after a while if she will say yes. This removes the girl’s father from the process, when his permission should be sought upfront. This is the real risk for the boy to initiate! Courtship protects the girl from boys running roughshod over her, which is systematically allowed in dating. Labels are relative here. While "dating" has bad connotations, it isn’t against Scripture for a boy and girl to go out alone. "Courtship" comes from a medieval system associated with immorality. “Some couples who ‘date’ are in closer conformity with biblical principles than other couples who embrace the ‘courtship’ model.”

There you have it

My 3 oldest kids are really into mazes, very complicated nearly impossible mazes. I think this love stemmed from the book "Monumental Mazes" by Richard Burnie (which I confess I bought because I thought it was too cool). This maze madness has spilled over into drawing their own monumental, 20x36" size mazes for mom and dad to figure out. They include trap doors, fishing piers, secret passages, caves, and more. Often, they are impossible to complete, but the fun is in the creating.

Right now they're busy making another monumental maze, but my oldest son just told me that I'm in luck today. This maze isn't for me - it's for Dad because he's smarter. Well. Hmm. They sure know how to push mom's competition buttons!

Worship the Lord!

If you're interested in worship services I lead on Sunday mornings, you can usually find the printed bulletin on the web, here.

Preaching, or Meddling?

Wagner, Tongues Aflame, p. 45

"The preacher who stands before his people and roundly denounces the sins of others, and yet fails to confront his hearers with their own greed, lust, hard-heartedness, and pride, is not bold, no matter how loudly he may thunder. It is relatively easy for a preacher to let fly the salvos of Scripture against the communists, the Roman Catholics, the homosexuals, the drunks, or the secular humanists -- most of whom are probably absent from his Sunday services. But how many will clearly and boldly address in relevant and challenging ways the evils of broken relationships between members of the church, poisonous envy among church leaders, generally tolerated compromises with worldliness among the affluent sheep who believe they have earned it, or the chronic laziness of the poor man who likes to think of himself as a victim?"

Recurring patterns

I'm reading a great pre-teen mystery book now called "Chasing Vermeer" - it's all about strange coincidences that have repeating items in them, much like the paintings Vermeer did. My mind is overtaken by this book; it's fun, has secret codes, Vermeer (!)...what's not to love?

So I've noticed some repeating patterns in my own crafting lately. See the socks below that I'm working on? And the tshirt mods in my previous post? After I finished the shirt, I was amazed to realize I used the exact same colors as were in the sock yarn. Subliminal messages from the depths of my mind? A call for an ocean side retreat? Or just favorite colors percolating to the surface of my conscious? You decide.

Old Shirt, New Shirt

I had two shirts, both quite nice but too short for my tastes. Enter in scissors, DMC floss, and a Dover book of ornaments.

Inspired by the book "Alabama Stitches" I tried my hand at some reverse applique. I added to the hem of the shirt to add length with a line of running stitch broken up with random knots and string ends. I can see this done on skirts, jeans (getting a great frayed edge), napkins, tablecloths, and more.