I'm getting things ready for our homeschool year to start again next week. I've been going through curriculum books, buying binders, sorting through lists, visiting Kinkos, and then buying more office supplies. I was voted "Most Organized" in high school ("Cutest Dimples" too, but that's another topic). It's one thing to keep oneself organized, but keeping a family of 6 pulled together is a challenge. My goal this year is NOT to have piles of papers as permanent countertop decorations. So I'm devising systems, color coding everything, labelling dividers, and generally over-doing it. Last year my organization lasted about 2 weeks according to my weekly planner (which I haven't seen in months). I know I will fail again this year, but the education will not fail.
I attempt and fail at organizing and creating no-fail systems, but there remains FAITH.
There is faith that somehow despite my personal failures, lost tempers, lack of initiative, and general sinfulness, God will work through my hands to bless our children. They will learn to read, they will conquer division, they will get "b" and "d" figured out. But most of all, I have faith that we will come closer to God as a family. Let me be honest; somedays it is very difficult to have faith, especially when our home looks like a tornado blew through, the fridge is empty, and we seem to be stuck on the Exodus forever!
Faith is different from HOPE. They're cousins, to be sure, but faith is concrete. It's not a feeling, a big spiritual deep breath, or anything like that. It is my bedrock that remains when all else is stripped away. It cannot be removed, not by circumstances, nothing. It is a precious gift from God!
I feel disorganized and overwhelmed by the looming demands over the next months, but I have faith that God will work it all out. And we'll get through it with joy.